2006 Headlines

We haven’t had any fun here in a while and Jim appears to be away, so I offer a list of headlines we might see in 2006:

Kaine Takes Smart Car to Transportation Town Hall, Arrives Late

Colonial Williamsburg Demands Patriot Pass Purchase
Inauguration Moved to Busch Gardens

Hokies Add Southside College to 2007 Football Schedule

LeBlanc Demands Overtime Pay

CGI Loses State Contract, Replaced by Computers & Critters LLC

Eight Staffers Share One Cubicle in Manassas Zoning Office

Not Larry Sabato Blog Folds, Tribbett Moves to Satellite Radio

Sweet Revenge: Potts Resigns from Senate to Manage Weicker Campaign

Vegetarians Claim Under-Representation in Kaine Administration

Vehrs Arrested for Possession of Mysterious Dry Powder

Baril Transportation Plan “On the Table”

Schapiro Biography Published: Memoirs of a “Good Copy”

Gang Activity Increases in House of Delegates

Pit Bull Proposed as State Dog

Pat Robertson Unsure Who to Blame for Bird Flu Pandemic

DGIF Officials Make Surprise Visit to Virginia Game Preserve

Fitch Sighted at Local Wal-Mart

Herndon to Franchise Labor Centers, Income May Eliminate Local Taxes

Historian: Source of Transportation Crisis Faulty Human Settlement Patterns at Jamestown

[Feel free to add your own headlines in the comments, as ace poster subpatre did!]


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Comments

6 responses to “2006 Headlines”

  1. You’ve been reading the Onion again, haven’t you Will?

  2. Will Vehrs Avatar

    Busted.

    Happy New Year.

  3. DGIF Officials Make Surprise Visit to Virginia

    Jackson Pollack to Design Pocahontas Extension

    Potts Appointed Secretary of Finance

    Departments of Education and Transportation Merged;
    Future Schools Privately Managed, Toll-Based

  4. Lucy Jones Avatar

    Northrop Grumman Loses Contract; Commonwealth Technology Now Maintained by the Geek Squad

  5. Manassas Revamps Residential Rules, Mayor Says Single Family Housing To Be Singles Only

    General Assembly to Outlaw Droopy Drawers
    (oops, that was 2005)

  6. Not Guy Incognito Avatar
    Not Guy Incognito

    re: droopy drawers… I heard rumors a while ago that he’s going to re-introduce it again this session.


    Kaine Furrows Brow over State Budget

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